I Choose Not to Get Involved: A New Kid, Day ?

Okay, so, somewhere between softball games and the terrible twos, I lost track of the days of my little Leman experiment. Oh, well, I say. The important thing is, I am still sticking to it.

Per Leman's advice, I have chosen to no longer get involved in sibling rivalry. That is, when my girls argue (fight) with each other, call names, or, in general, get on each other's nerves, I stay out of it. Getting in the middle only makes matters worse, and someone always ends up getting mad at me! So, I simply do not get involved. When one of my girls comes to me whining that her sister took her shirt or borrowed her nail polish or won't pick up her side of the room or whatever sort of drama is going on, I simply tell the child, "I'm not getting involved. You two work it out." And, you know what? This strategy workds! Yes, they still argue, but they do figure out a way to work whatever it is out, and I don't have to be the bad guy! I've been doing this for several days now, and (pinch me!), the girls have been arguing A LOT less!

Along these same lines, when I hear the girls being rude to each other or calling names, I don't intervene. Like a spider, I just wait patiently in my web for the correct moment to strike. At some point the child will want something from me or will want to do something, and that is the moment I get them! Muhhaha! For example, yesterday Isabelle and Peyton (my second and third daughters) were cleaning their room and were particularly catty to each other. I listened but said nothing. After the room was clean, they emerged and asked to watch TV. I replied, "I'm sorry, girls, but you cannot watch TV because I didn't like the way you were treating each other while you were cleaning your room. You were very mean to each other, and that is not acceptable in this family." You should have seen their mouths drop! But, what came out of those mouths? Nothing! Not a whine, not a protest. They accepted what I had said without argument. Cue the Hallelujah chorus, please!